Respite Foster Families Provide Support

NOTE TO EDITORS: The following is a feature story prepared by the Department of Community Services.

At the bowling alley, a couple with a teenage boy is smiling as too few pins fall. Over at the lake, a mother with a couple of children are out for a summer picnic on a hot day. Laughing, loving, caring.

It's a typical family scene, with a difference. These adults -- professional couples, single parents and same sex partners -- are pitching in to help others. They are respite foster families.

Occasionally, usually one weekend a month, respite foster families take over from full-time foster families, to provide a home to children and youth in care.

The term respite means to provide rest or relief, and that's exactly the plan says Jill Wilson Kingston, provincial co-ordinator, foster care services with the Department Of Community Services.

"By providing a respite foster home, you're not only supporting a child or youth in care, but you're helping and supporting other families," says Ms. Wilson Kingston.

Eva Molcson, a physical education teacher and single mother with three children, says she's satisfying her own desire by helping out by providing a respite foster home. "I'm fulfilling my own need in one way, and fulfilling the need to care for these children in another. All you need is room in your home and room in your heart."

Many people are drawn to helping children and youth in care and to helping out foster families. Respite foster families can be former foster families who understand the weight of being full-time, a family curious about how fostering works, or a family who wants to give back to the community.

"We don't want this to be overwhelming," says Ms. Wilson Kingston. "Folks only need to commit to what works for them. From the feedback we get, it usually turns out to be a really great time for the family and the child or youth in care."

She is quick to underline that the program is flexible enough to suit everyone involved.

From the foster family point of view, there are many benefits to having a respite family. Sometimes there could be a family emergency where it's not appropriate for children and youth to be at home, or maybe a foster family member suffers an unexpected illness or is suddenly hospitalized. With a respite foster family, the children or youth still get the care they need.

These situations may sound challenging but approved foster homes, whether they are a respite home or a full-time home, are offered ongoing support, education programs and involvement in local Foster Family Associations to assist with their role as foster parents.

Whatever the reason, respite care offers full-time foster families, a chance to spend some quality time with other family members or just taking time for themselves.

Ms. Molcson became involved at the urging of a neighbour. For years, she was a full-time foster parent. Now, she eagerly offers her home for respite care. "I've actually stepped in those shoes. Sometimes you don't have friends and family around to help. You need this support."

An enthusiastic participant, Ms. Molcson says, "It's like a spice of life to help. It's a challenge. It is very hard to turn these kids down."

Ms. Molcson says it can be very easy for people in a stable family situation to take it for granted. However, it isn't like that for everyone.

She suggests respite foster families should be open-minded, non-judgmental and value family life.

People, or families, interested in the respite foster family program can call 1-800-565-1884 for more information.